So here’s a little info about lil ole me. I don’t necessarily consider myself a people pleaser—not in the sense where I feel that if I don’t adhere to what other’s want of me that my value and sense of person relies on it. I definitely do things to make others happy, but, I think it’s because I myself get joy from being able to help others with things. I like to be needed and I do genuinely live to be there for others emotionally and physically.
The thing is, sometimes I want to help people so much that I feel that I will have failed as a human if I let others down because of my short comings.
And the thing is, I’m not God. No matter how much I want to be everywhere for everyone, I can’t be. And that kills me, it really really does.
I care so very deeply about those around me and I am so genuinely encouraged when I’m able to help others! But, I’m learning that right now, I’m in a place where I in fact do NOT have my life in order. At all.
And you know what? That’s okay.
Everyone is responsible for themselves. It doesn’t make you selfish if you need to take personal time to figure yourself out and make sure that you have yourself in order. You know what that shows? Boundaries. It shows that you know that in order to “love your neighbor as yourself” sometimes you need to love yourself by making sure you have your house in order. And being that my house (life, bedroom, everything at this point tbh) is not in order, I’m going to be responsible and take care of that. And you know what? I think that’s what God wants for us. He wants us to do everything with the mindset of giving Him the glory (1 Corinthians 10:31). So if that means you need to look yourself in your room to study / have some quality “me-time”, or if that means you need to go love on your friend in need? Go do whatever the Lord is calling you to do. It’s a balancing act, my friends.
Sincerely the girl walking on this type-rope of life✌🏼
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